Strip!

What a power packed word it is. Strip conjures up all sorts of steamy images of clothes being ripped off and flung into oblivion as you and the new, or not so new but still hot, mate throw off the world to plop in bed and get the evening started. At least that’s one way to think about it, but not the only. Titillating as that image is, I have something else in mind, more like a slow and conscious act where stripping is the focal point rather than a bump in the road to bliss on the mattress.

Recently, I was reminded of how sublime being stripped slowly and deliberately can be. An added treat was being blindfolded, which I had not experienced in a while. With vision out of the picture, I could feel myself relaxing almost immediately and letting all tensions flow out of my body. I could feel myself surrendering and going into touch space more easily and quickly than normal.

Regardless of one’s age or body type, we all have varying degrees of negative images about our own bodies-a few extra pounds here, a wrinkle there, too hairy, too smooth, and endless other things. I find it interesting that most of these images are tied to vision. For this reason, something as simple as a blindfold can have a transformative effect on the person being stripped, as well as on the stripper.

A main theme in these posts on Sacred Intimacy has been about our having the freedom to touch and about freeing our body’s largest organ, the skin. An insight I had from this recent experience of being stripped was the importance of freeing touch from being subservient to vision. Inevitably, we can achieve this in the process of any body work because we instinctively close our eyes to travel inward as we go into a blissful state. Being stripped, however, intensifies this experience, especially when it is done in a supportive, loving, and conscious manner. Here, the focus is on waking the body up gradually as it adjusts to breathing through all its pores without the limitations of clothing. And, there is time to process out any negativity as well as to sync breathing with your partner.

There is nothing sweeter than feeling the movement of air or of another human being wafting over your naked body. As the stripping progresses, both bodies quite naturally come together-there hardly needs to be a manual or any instruction, we are programmed for physical closeness and love. As I have said in many posts, let touch be your guide. Too often, our all too human customs have gotten in the way by pulling us apart. Here’s where I weigh in with a tip of the hat to mother nature and stripping!

Bottoms Up!

Our butts are pleasure gardens, virtual Edens south of the border and north of the garter! Yet, how often do we really take the time to linger in the joys they can give us? Maybe it is because anal ecstasy takes time to stimulate, the opposite of cock energy which is often hell bent on charging forward in a rush to the grand finale of love making. Like many guys, I suppose, it has taken me a long time to appreciate the subtleties of the rosebud and its passive energy.

Let’s face it, there are a lot of hangups associated with our butts-most of the time they are doing the job of waste removal. Unlike our cocks which have an innate programming for spewing out liquids, whether they be waste water or man milk, rosebuds have been trained since early childhood to hold back material until it is ready to exit-hence a deeply innate reaction against penetration. Well lads, where does that leave us? Yes, butt multitasking! We have to learn a different erotic vocabulary if we are to fully enjoy rosebud bliss. By the way, this is something straight guys can benefit from so get your wives or girlfriends to explore with you-or, if you have a gay buddy, ask him to give you a hand, so to speak.

For me, a key challenge in learning the tao of the butt has been overcoming the shroud of shame about our little pleasure holes. As you think about how to experience the ecstasy of butt heaven, think of the wave action you see at a beach. Imagine the gentle ebb and flow of waves as they slowly repeat themselves building energy, layer upon layer, until the big one, the climax, is reached followed by a series of waves dissipating and spreading the water energy outwards.

Begin by building the energy with a full body gentle massage. As you work down your partner’s back, spend some time caressing his butt and working those lushy muscles. Don’t be afraid to part his cheeks so that you can gently rub his rosebud from time to time-no this is not the time for you to play Moses parting the sea for a phalanx of people to charge through! Take your time, tease him, let him absorb the ripples of pleasure your probing fingers set in motion. Alternate rubbing his cheeks and rosebud with some gentle tugging of his butt hairs to add a dash of pepper to the sensations. Now that you are next door to his balls, pay them some attention too-everybody wants a part in the parade so start bringing them in.

As you massage the rest of his body, keep returning to the butt until he is relaxed enough to open himself to you. His rosebud will become more receptive to you as you insert your finger into its inner chamber-I do recommend your wearing a latex glove for deep anal work. Be gentle in there, don’t push too hard, and stay in tune with him so as not to overdo it. Remember, it’s about a slow and steady build up of pleasure and receptivity. We all have different stimuli for pleasure, and by being in tune with each other you will find what works for you both. Depending on your relationship with your buddy, he may want you to enter him with your penis. Our erect cocks have a unique and special energy all their own that I have not found in any other part of the body. With a relaxed and open rosebud, connecting with your buddy through massaging his inner sanctum with your cock is about the most satisfying experience I can think of regardless of your being the active or passive partner.

With every intimate connection between people, we reclaim our humanness, and our openness to sharing a deeply loving and caring relationship for each other. There is nothing more wonderfully human than to be naked and sharing intimacy with another, and this is what eros is all about. Every time we say bollux to taboos and shame, we enrich our lives and become more human.